**4.2. Women's most important duty is satisfying their husbands/getting dressed up for their husbands:** *ibadah*

Rather than a personal sense of satisfaction, there is a religious justification for the fact that women display their feminine attractions at home.17 Displaying feminine attraction to her husband is a religious command and *ibadah*.

"According to Islam, a woman's most important duty is satisfying her husband, looking beautiful to him… Getting dressed up for husbands is an *ibadah* as long as she does not show this to other men… I frankly think that this is very important for both men and women. There is something mutual. Women want to be admired, and men want to see beauty. If he protects himself outside, he tries not to look…" (G-11).

<sup>15</sup>Women's indoor clothing styles are not independent from the Jamia mission. In a television program broadcast by Ismailağa Jamia members, a female audience member asked, "Can a woman stay at home bareheaded?" and the answer was: "Indeed, a woman can wear revealing clothes in the home, but this can pose an obstacle for angels of mercy to enter houses and for the spirits of prophets, martyrs and good people. Of course, uncovering the hair a little is acceptable, but a woman should cover her hair as far as possible. It will not be appropriate." https://www.youtube.com. (Accessed: January 7, 2017) [48]. <sup>16</sup>*Women between Modernity and Religiousness* is a study conducted with women who define themselves as Nur students, but do not belong to any of the Nur communities in Turkey. The women improved their religious thinking and practices by reinterpreting the religious texts named *Risale-i Nur* using a hermeneutic method. They also carried out economic events articulated to modern life as a result of the activities carried out in the meetings for religious conversation named *Sohbet*. Two of these events were a fireproof gloves factory and Kırçiçeği kindergarten. The ideas of these women about women having a profession, receiving higher education and working are close to Islamic feminism. The women have no knowledge of any kind of feminism. Nevertheless, it is remarkable in terms of religious sociology that they reached the level of Islamic feminist thought by reinterpreting the *Risale-i Nur* texts. Each of the characteristics specific to this group is a separate research subject. The most important characteristics include love, the preacher-student relationship, theodicy, the specific language they created in a state of consciousness that reminds one of Kristeva, and shaping daily life within the context of *Esma-ülHüsna* (the beautiful names of Allah).

<sup>17</sup>The indispensability of this *principle* has been emphasized in many religious conversations we participated in for *Çarşaflı Dindarlık*. Some women who are not happy with their marriages and do not like sexual intercourse stated that they performed sexual intercourse since they were afraid of "being cursed by the angels," although they did not want intercourse or feel any satisfaction. However, forcing women to do so does not always lead them to dress in an "attractive or pleasing" way. Although many women in the Jamia accept the rightness of the principle, being or looking beautiful at home, they do not enact this principle. The reasons for this are unhappiness, old couples, or men's wish to see their women in *taqwa*. "I would do it if my husband wanted, but my husband does not make any *perverted demands* like that. However, I can do it if he says so" (a woman from İsmailağa Jamia).

The indispensability of this principle has been emphasized in many religious conversations we participated in for Çarşaflı Dindarlık. Some women who are not happy with their marriages and do not like sexual intercourse stated that they performed sexual intercourse since they were afraid of "being cursed by the angels," although they did not want intercourse or feel any satisfaction. However, forcing women to do so does not always lead them to dress in an "attractive or pleasing" way. Although many women in the Jamia accept the rightness of the principle, being or looking beautiful at home, they do not enact this principle. The reasons for this are unhappiness, old couples, or men's wish to see their women in taqwa. "I would do it if my husband wanted, but my husband does not make any perverted demands like that. However, I can do it if he says so" (a woman from İsmailağa Jamia).

This quote shows a change in different themes that reflect the participant's (G-11) identity as a *hodja*. The fact that her interlocutor is a student and a talker is an instructor is in question. At the beginning of the quote, the issue was holiness,18 and no opportunity for criticism was admitted. A woman should display her feminine attractions to only her husband. Looking beautiful and attractive, as long as other men do not see her, is *ibadah*. It is clear that the social actor's personal approach developed within the dogmatic frame of religious rules. The hypothesis was reinforced with the use of first-person singular pronoun describing the appropriateness of men and women's natures to this rule. Satisfying women's need to be admired and men's desire to see beauty in private appears as a mechanism that is encouraged by religiousness. A man who protects himself from sin by not looking at women who are not *halal* outside in social life, where feminine attraction is all around, already deserves his wife's sexual duty.

#### *4.2.1. Women should protect their husbands from other women's attraction*

The first argument that religious Muslim women developed to overcome the conflict between looking beautiful and veiling is the notion of serving for religion, and the second is the duty to protect their husbands from *haram* Ref [4]. In both cases, protecting religious man from *haram* is required because of the feminine attractions of bareheaded women in society.

"Now, this is not only valid in the current business world. The moment you go out, it is hard because now women compete with each other, am I clear? Lots of things are cheap now. It's easier to get lots of things… Women will not wear again what they wore once. They are always made up and always well-groomed. Sometimes, they catch your eye even if you are a woman. You look at her! She makes her clothing and makeup go with each other (emphasis). Okay, it is a sin. She should not do it, but she does. It suits her. She gets out of bed flamingly, and she goes to bed flamingly… Then, you think that your husband is with these women in business life or outside… I don't think that there is a limit for this" (G-11).

This quote describes the feminine danger that religious men encounter outside the home and indicates a wide divergence between different femininities. G-11's language and approach toward bareheaded women position herself against a life style she has disowned. She thinks bareheaded women have the power to offer pleasure, and that men have a weakness for this power. This requires religious Muslim women to display and use their feminine attractions at home. Bareheaded women who think wrongly (non-religiously) and do wrong (sin) are considered a threat to Muslim families, and this lays the burden of being beautiful, attractive, and charming at home on religious Muslim women.

Another speech text which different femininities are perceived as a threat is largely in agreement with this study's finding.

"I think no man…Therefore, I am jealous of my husband because other women show everything. I want them to close everything a little… Not only for my husband, for everyone else, too, because I cannot do their actions to my husband outside… A bareheaded woman takes

<sup>18</sup>A great majority of Islamic law and interpretative works (Gazali is an exception because he attributed importance to women's sexual satisfaction) state that women should be ready for their husbands, not that men should be ready for their wives. This biased attitude is obvious even in contemporary discussions that attempt to discuss sexual rights of men and women in an egalitarian way. Kecia Ali says that, in this case, an important duty falls to those who redefine sexual life in marriage as a mutual and egalitarian effort [44].

care of her hair and clothing… Why… But, we do not take care of ourselves as much as they do. Maybe I am not a well-groomed woman but, even my well-groomed friends do not take care of themselves as much as they do. For example, there are more bareheaded women… Their skirts and socks… I enviably looked at her. She was very beautiful. They dress carefully" (G-7).

The use of the first-person personal pronoun, I, in this quote shows emotions and thoughts rather than a religious rule. The participant, who said that she is jealous of her husband due to bareheaded women's beauty and attractions, feels weak and defenseless as a woman. The social actor, who complains19 that she cannot achieve the expected body shape because of her excess weight, feels that she cannot be as attractive as other women. In this sense, her desire to limit the visibility of bareheaded women is based on personal emotions rather than a religious rule.

The idea of protecting the husband from *haram*, which is deemed a duty by Muslim religious women, was detailed explicitly in interviews about the research question. This idea, which has turned into an ideal especially among the women of Ismailağa Jamia, has become a religious basis for legalizing their own femininities. Among female members of the Jamia, femininity in private life is not an expression of their own desires, but protecting their husbands from *haram*. Although there are women, such as G-11, who care about mutual satisfaction and openly express this, the fact that femininity is generally based on religion arises from the idea that feminine tendencies, which are independent from the husband, are not appropriate for *taqwa*.
