**4. Some common values and practices in Ghana, Nigeria and Liberia that foster good parenting**

#### **4.1. The extended family system**

According to Degbey (2012), the family is usually the major source of the basic necessities of life and health; the love and tenderness, food, water, clothing, shelter and sanitation which are made possible by the socio-economic, cultural and environmental conditions. Thus in discus‐ sing major issues with regards to parenting, it would be impossible to overlook the functions of the family (Degbey, 2012).

It is basically known that there are two types of the family. These are the nuclear and the extended family. The nuclear family is made up of only both parents and the children. The extended family is also made up of the nuclear family; in addition are the uncles, aunties, grandparents and cousins. It would be emphasized that in the African community, the extended family is traditionally practiced (Degbey, 2012). In the same vein, it is a common knowledge that when one speaks of the family in an African context, one is referring not to the nuclear family but the extended family (Gyekye, 1996).

According to Degbey (2012), the extended family system includes several generations plus cousins, uncles, and aunts living in a compound or close to one another. Similarly, Adinlofu (2009) stated that the extended family is composed of a number of joint, compound, elementary and nuclear families occupying separate but nearby homesteads. Degbey (2012) and Adinlofu (2009) further noted that the extended family provides emotional needs to all involved. It is a cohesive unit which ideally provides economic, social and psychological security to all its members. Adinlofu (2009) made mentioned that the extended family ensures procreation of children and provides for the early care and training of children. Degbey (2012) also added that this same family system defines "social and moral norms and safeguards both material and spiritual customs and traditions as well as providing a variety of role models preparing the way for adulthood". Degbey (2012) emphasized that the dominance of the elders/aged has a relatively high degree of social control on the individual especially, the youth.

The uniqueness of this system with regards to parenting in our traditional African commun‐ ities is that the responsibility in taking care of the child is not only to the biological parents. This is shared by all in the extended family. This is buttressed by the African proverb on parenting which says that, "a single hand cannot nurse a child". This implies that although the mother has the responsibility of taking care of the child, the responsibility is being shared by all. Most of us went to school on the strength of this system; otherwise we would have been stark illiterate and walking about aimlessly (Adinlofu, 2009). According to the author, some of us must have read and heard comments like: "my parents were so poor that it was my mum's brother or father's sister, that helped towards my education" or, that "it was my father's brother that trained me to read medicine, law or pharmacy and it was my in-law that gave me money to go into business". It is intriguing to know that this system is where a brother trained a younger brother or sister and they in turn help to train younger ones or older siblings' children. This is why it is even said that even when parents are dead, a child would always have 'parents'. This is because the extended family is there to cushion or parent the child.

Another uniqueness of this extended family system is that children or the youth stay at home i.e. live with the family until they are ready for marriage. Even if the young adult is staying with the nuclear family, the practice is that you marry before you leave the house. According to Gyekye (1996), growing adults are generally expected to live at home-in the family house and they may leave only after they marry. Even after marriage the parents would still want to offer advice and guidance since they believe they the adults have richer experiences than their children at any age.

At other instances, the extended family may not be together, but then the nuclear family may live with other nuclear families who may not be relatives. This system of living is what we call the "compound house" system. Also, this system allows any elderly person to discipline or correct a child.

#### **4.2. Relevance**

good and bad behaviour, having a sexual division of labour (e.g., men's work versus women's

While all cultures have these and possibly many other universal traits, different cultures have developed their own specific ways of carrying out or expressing them. So also is parenting. A culture is normally passed from one generation to another, from knowledgeable adult to learning child. Since the adult has imbibed the norms and practices of the culture from older acculturated adults, this transmission is often simply through exposure and through example. For instance the Orangutan mother, who uses a specially prepared stick to fish out food from a crevice, learnt this skill and is now teaching it to her child who is hanging on her shoulder

**4. Some common values and practices in Ghana, Nigeria and Liberia that**

According to Degbey (2012), the family is usually the major source of the basic necessities of life and health; the love and tenderness, food, water, clothing, shelter and sanitation which are made possible by the socio-economic, cultural and environmental conditions. Thus in discus‐ sing major issues with regards to parenting, it would be impossible to overlook the functions

It is basically known that there are two types of the family. These are the nuclear and the extended family. The nuclear family is made up of only both parents and the children. The extended family is also made up of the nuclear family; in addition are the uncles, aunties, grandparents and cousins. It would be emphasized that in the African community, the extended family is traditionally practiced (Degbey, 2012). In the same vein, it is a common knowledge that when one speaks of the family in an African context, one is referring not to

According to Degbey (2012), the extended family system includes several generations plus cousins, uncles, and aunts living in a compound or close to one another. Similarly, Adinlofu (2009) stated that the extended family is composed of a number of joint, compound, elementary and nuclear families occupying separate but nearby homesteads. Degbey (2012) and Adinlofu (2009) further noted that the extended family provides emotional needs to all involved. It is a cohesive unit which ideally provides economic, social and psychological security to all its members. Adinlofu (2009) made mentioned that the extended family ensures procreation of children and provides for the early care and training of children. Degbey (2012) also added that this same family system defines "social and moral norms and safeguards both material and spiritual customs and traditions as well as providing a variety of role models preparing the way for adulthood". Degbey (2012) emphasized that the dominance of the elders/aged has

a relatively high degree of social control on the individual especially, the youth.

work) making jokes and playing games.

68 Parenting in South American and African Contexts

and intently watching (parenting and culture).

the nuclear family but the extended family (Gyekye, 1996).

**foster good parenting**

of the family (Degbey, 2012).

**4.1. The extended family system**

The extended family is a strong tool in parenting. It helps to develop a strong sense of social responsibility in the child from his early years and learns to be respectful, responsible and supportive member of the extended family and society.
